Can you believe it! I'm done with Middlemarch. Finally. It was amazing. It might have changed my life. She writes how I think I would write if I could write well. I almost feel like she is me. This idea of having ambition so profoundly in your bones like that. About honor. I was moving stuff. I have a feeling I'm going to become one of those few Eliot fans. 

More than anything right now, I'm excited to move on to the next thing. 

I used to write so much in these! Lately, I've just been banging through them and writing nothing. I hit a hurdle with Middlemarch, which is pretty good. Almost a year and a half later and I finally slowed down on a book. And it was almost entirely because we've just been so swamped. 

Then before that Hugo came, we got sick. My family came to visit, first my mom and then my brother. And we moved from Paris to Edinburgh and had to deal with all the little details there. Dani did her coding Bootcamp and that had some stressful moments, but honestly not as many as I expected. I got a new job and had all the familiar emotions once again, and got too wrapped up in the every day of that tiny universe that's created. And I stopped reading really. Not that I've cared. I've been more than happy to just watch TikToks and chill out at the end of the day. 

But, something does feel like it's missing. I read. And write, apparently. That's me. I think as things settle down (though I'm starting to think they never will, as every day that goes by, I become more and more of a person that is responsible for the wellbeing of others and not just myself), I will get back into the swing of things. 

Middlemarch is beautiful. Every time I open it I think it might be the best book I ever read. It feels like what I thought War & Peace would be. Infinitely dense, rich. Her dialogue is so subtle and funny, and she makes fun of her characters in a way that I have to read each page very slowly so I don't miss anything. 

And that's probably part of why I am stuck at 300 pages. I actually have to read, not skim, this one. 

Unrelated, back to life. This apartment is unbelievably beautiful. High ceilings, almost disturbingly intricate crown molding. Great windows with morning and evening light. And we've found all of the best furniture, almost like it fell out of the sky. Artie seems happy too. More space and much quieter. 

Notes

🍻 Would I get a beer with the author? 

boring book club

George Eliot, Middlemarch

Highlights